Hospitalized

Things continue to go downhill fast. I'm not able to eat or drink. Now, my mouth and esophagus are so  painful I can't even swallow saliva or air. I'm getting weaker and weaker. I managed to work from home one day (Tuesday) and  piddle around the house a little but with great effort. On Wednesday I finally call Dr. Kilgore and make an appointment to come in and get IV fluids. Rand helps me into the clinic. Once I get there I crash. I begin to sob, although I can't speak, I'm running fever, trembling, so sick I feel like I'm dying. They start an IV through my port and decide I need to be admitted to the hosptial. The hospital brings a gurney to transport me because I'm too weak to sit up. My fever is 102, and I have a horrible case of thrush that is from my mouth all the way down my espophagus. My esophagus goes into spasm every time I try to swallow. My WBC's are 0.1 so I am placed in neutropenic precautions. Several different antibiotics are ordered and run simultaneously. I lay there and think..."I thought I decided I wasn't going to put myself through this again"